I
Can you hear the Sound of the Silence?
Can you really know what do they say?
Struggling hard inside one's mind
as the world continue sending and receiving
in a lapse of a second.
A fast-paced mind that can see infinite views,
turned against itself when the reason is lost,
leading to fast-paces conclusions
no one ever thought he would think.
In one of those unexpected events,
it came with a single conclusion,
asking itself it it was reasonable
to maintain the broken things left,
to try again the same initiatives,
to apply the learned in something unknown,
to face the same fears over and over again....
There was nothing you can do,
without getting out your comfort zone.
All opened ways are getting to a closing point,
but a scarce few weak ones are still there...
Whatever sound I hear from my headphones right now,
if it touches me, I'll have that sensation of emotion...
II
A narrow area to step on one foot,
and the other stepping on sensitive strings,
each thing I see, I hear, I smell, I touch,
is leading me to fall into dismay....
The matter is unstoppable,
but why I can't move a single finger,
only seeing up above and let time flow,
the flow that everyone else follows....
People talk, people see,
people come, people go,
people and more people,
it's all about them, but:
Where they came from?
How can I find them?
How can I approach them?
How can I feel secure?
Don't care if tears might fall in harmonious flow,
It's only the result of my eternal flaws...
III
If it wasn't for this sensation,
of overwhelming shyness,
I could be the most normal person,
I could be the thing I really wanted to be.
And if it wasn't for those experiences,
those that came from the past,
I would know in which times I was wrong,
I would know in which times not to be insecure.
But instead of throw everything away
and say this's a lost cause and rant,
against everything, against everyone,
and let myself dive into a bottomless pit,
I just won't.
And that didn't came from my parents,
that didn't came from my friends,
that didn't came from my classmates,
nor teachers, nor school, nor else.
It came from myself, the other part,
the one who is immune of all emotion,
the base of MY LIFE, MY WORLD.
Formed once when trying to solve everything.
Word by word, the echoes hurt my mind,
shaking hands that can't stand powerful ideas...
IV
Yeah, who cares if I cry or not,
who cares if I try to be nice every time,
even in the most remote cases,
it wouldn't care if events can be spoiled.
But all that suffering isn't right,
but I'll endure all of it if necessary,
on same situations others would fall,
then they see their problems....
I didn't want to be this way but I see
crying isn't the thing I like to myself
feeling lonely isn't the thing they want,
struggling a lot isn't as normal as it should be.
But here I am, trying to put end ALL of THIS,
even if I can't stand up, I fall constantly,
I won't let my emotions control my life,
I won't let my mind to believe all what I think.
But only one word, the supportive one would help,
until I believe I shouldn't depend on people....
