[DOUBLE POST AGAIN...! I have to be careful with that later....]
Today, yeah, so I don’t know why I have to be sorry, moreover who I have to ask an apology. Because it’s not like I feel to have done anything wrong, because nobody said that I have done so.
There are the two sides of a single story:
One, the situation of having online friends, meeting then and talk to them, but feeling like it’s difficult to maintain those relationships. Of course, as long as it’s only in the online domain, it’s not going to be different than a real life friendship, unless that online contact is one of your real life friends. I don’t deny the fact they are online friends, but in the actual situation I am, I’m searching for a huge amount of support on the online friendships, so I can reach the real life level. Still, I’m here always, I just have to search the one who is here always and talk, or have a chat or something, hehe.... I have to dare myself.
Two, the situation of feeling like you haven’t made a good impression to the other person and therefore he rarely appears, or that he may reject you or something.... Again, the online friendship is only a different kind of relation, and that if you have some good real life friendships that only have your online communication with them, it’s obvious that you won’t go further, but if someone is on the position of going further, you have to face whatever thing everybody else would say and face it. But maybe I don’t have courage to talk to people.... or what to expect when they do unexpected things, especially after I have talk directly to them, but maybe it’s not my fault what makes them have those kind of decisions, but sometimes, in order to not make me feel bad they don’t say a thing, and that’s what I get wrong ideas. I would rather, and it’s better to make things clear in order to make a decision of continuing or searching for other things, because in some way I’m giving my time for someone, and that’s a consideration.
I just feel weird, because everyday I’m here, so if somebody is not here I kind of wonder, and I wonder more if I have made a conversation and he may not have answered. I’ll give them time then. It’s not like I want to know right know the answer, because this is the Internet, even if it feels like we’re all face to face.
