That's one of the things I haven't really experienced...
I wasn't such an influence back on my days of School, and even if they could see me all the time, I would be sure in a way they wouldn't care, or that's what I thought. I didn't have lots of friends, the few I had didn't have problems handling strong conversations. There are a few of them that I really wanted to become friends, but technically it didn't happen. Back then I was trying my best to talk to them, but somehow a concrete bonding wasn't there, the experience of getting on the people and not responding to it wasn't pleasant. But then they seem to acknowledge the fact though nothing else was done.
And all these years of trying and trying was another experience I was making my effort. Effort to stop repressing my emotions and thoughts. My years On-line as a User and all what I found when I'm here, it was grateful. All and its extended resolutions, I managed to get in touch to a few more people. On-line of course. I started to talk more and more, as it were easy to do it, it was fun.
But then what I feared was coming to approach. But I was prepared to face it, because I knew it by experience... I could talk but then a dissonance of voices, and then the differences turning into a higher point, it becomes something in which, I can't have an idea to overcome this by talking.
Because I make some effort in talking, more if it's an unknown path, I can't make again with the same effort give a back-to-track message, unless certain conditions are met.
One of those conditions is, the person talking to were worried about myself...
Action noted, it could be a message of sorts or some mention. Anything that makes again the connection is enough. Another condition is actually make that back-to-track message, explaining how do you feel. On each part if a retribution is made, the bonding will try its best to regain its power.
Now then, lately I've been a little sleepy, on those stages, I'm more Introverted than anything else, but somehow I over-exceeded my Introversion. I didn't say anything about it, that I would take a break, that I need a great recharge, both physically and emotionally, that I need to deal with some problems, and that I needed more content to share and manage to talk, because I felt I was saying the same all the time.... It's not like it's going to be the same as before, but at least I want to feel comfortable the time I wanted to return.
But, what I wasn't expecting is, people telling me where I am, and how's everything going. A little few got nothing from me, worrying enough to make a state of presence and send me a message. The moment I knew it, I was, first surprised by a normal sudden anxiety from the recovery motion of Re encounter, and then a little frustrated and sad, because of feeling how selfish I was with those people.
I mean, it's not that the User Position is all important, the real world has its own challenges. Amazing challenges :B . But, as explained before, I just went away for a little while, and chaos surrounded the path I made with much effort. It's not like it's destroyed, it's just that I need to build more light to iluminate the path.
The path once made, it can be easily followed with the right compass.
