When I'm not into a good mood....

    Well, I don't know, it's like if I want to get things done and it doesn't get there, I kinda react weird about it. Maybe it just happens.

    But well, today was one of those days, where only by the single touch of some event; a great development of ideas would make you feel uncomfortable.... I don't get it, it's like your entire body is feeling weird (even if you have taken a bath...); every external action is a little annoying and distracts you from your focus. Whatever little thing they do is enough to make me feel anxious. It’s like I wanted to solve something important and then my possibilities are not enough to solve it, no matter how I see it. I desperately want to find some answers, and it just doesn't appear!

    Then I get to the real world, weird breathing, I know I’m fine, a weird headache, from all the generated ideas, a weird sensation, lots of blushing, embarrassment, clumsy actions, a constant movement from the lack of calm, lots of egocentric antisocial behavior, and a tendency to break out when nobody sees me. People normally won’t recognize this. Why would they? I’m not likely to show this type of emotions....

    Then at home I feel like I can’t stay still; I can’t stay calm, nothing can make me change my behavior easily. I take out my glasses, I put it on again, my sweater is making me feel warm inside, but when I take it out, I feel cold; at least some blanket would suffice. But then the blanket is so heavy to have me around my shoulders, I return to my sweater again. I play a game, thinking it would make me stress out from anger, but it just surprises me more, thinking I can win, but keep on losing, and make me feel sad....

    And then at night, a lot of movement, a lot of lightning, lots of weird voices, a lot of complaining and one or two little rant with myself. Then when it seems like my desperation would come to a limit, it just simply stops. I don’t know why, but it does. I feel like I’m getting peaceful and with no negative sensations to feel or negative ideas to hear inside my mind. It just fades away.

    I want to explain why it happened, but know that I’m calm, there’s nothing to explain, only to think that the eventful moment of anxiousness was only something I've experienced across the day. No one witnessed my accelerated day you had, because I could feel my heart pumping faster than normal, I could feel my hasty movements, my precipitated behavior, and also my endless need of letting out all that emotion, but it just can’t.

    But now it has stopped, there’s no need now. Now I want to be that way for the rest of the night, and think about tomorrow, hoping this won’t happen again, although I’m not sure if I could make it true....


    But oh well, hehe, nothing to worry about, it was just a day, everyone must have had one of those days, but that’s alright, because you can expect a better day, you can expect you can make good objectives, you can expect you can be good with people....

Random Post of the Month

    It’s been a while that I visit here, in fact, it’s like not everybody I know would visit here..., even if I’m still making promotions and stuff. But still I like to write, just that my emotional thoughts and my everyday activities made me not doing it. So here are some random thoughts of today:
    I know that I’m not as good as everybody; I haven’t experienced the things other people had. I have seen it on their post they make every day here and in their photos and their own thoughts, of course it’s not like I have the time with all the things I have to do on a single day..., or that’s what I always think....
    Anyway, I could see how people are talking in a curious way I get amazed by it. I would want to compare it with all the other male people I have seen, starting with the clothing. Extroverted people like to dress in a fashioned way, so they can show a physical appearance and a very good look in their faces. They also like to make comments about the things that happen in the world and other things. It’s common here to have behaviors and thinking in relation to people of the world, or in other words, globalization has made a great influence in this place. Of course it’s my country, near other great country with a relative mindful range of opinions that make surprises to everyone else and make influences on them too; I also was affected with that.
    Internet and the American culture inscribed in it, there’s no deny I would want to feel the modern cultural actions and events they usually have. I know people that feel the same, but the difference is that I have discovered by myself; therefore I’m in this alone, for now.
    I’m not worried, even though I have made lots of instances of my position with nobody taking the chance to it, maybe because I’m not in reality immersed in it, for now. I know I have done some things a globalized person would do, having blogs and pages other than the Great Social Network. Also I have been into other pages with forums, even though I haven’t entered fully as a user, and saw lots of videos, heard good music and played good games.
    The fact is even if I’m not a person whose roots are of the American culture, the influence here is extremely high; you could hear the voices across the board (because our country is like his brother... hehehe). So it’s obvious that we would want to be like our brother and live peacefully. I can think that we could share lots of good things. And also it would be awesome to be friends with some native person living in the USA, even if direct roots wouldn't appoint to someone living there. And also it would be cool if one of the people I know that knows a lot about Globalized culture would share things to me that I haven’t experienced a lot about it.
    The influence of that culture is great and even so I would not want to lose mine, in fact I don’t want all the influence. I have my culture and traditions we gladly celebrate. Also its political, economical and social ideas, especially social ideas are quite something. Everything with the relationship and other weird things you could find if you search well, seems to be as normal if you can see it from the Internet perspective, which I could think in reality some things are quite reserved, but still normal. I can’t really tell it because, I haven’t experienced it yet.
    Of course I have read all of these, of course I have seen their positions and of course I may have one or two in a direct or indirect position. Even if they may have a point, I can’t really tell it until I find the right direction to make it viable into my real position, and until I could find a relatable thing near the Place of Action.
    >///< I’m still confused..., I think. I don’t really want to develop more and dissociate some points of what I can say in this Position of the Nick. Only I can say I want to talk to whatever people who want to share his time with me, or at least wants to make me a good comment and make me feel happy at that day, regardless of whoever he is.
    I know for sure my position is against topics that could aggrieve severely to someone’s living. I know everyone is deserved to live and make a good contribution to the world, the two great things we are designed to be here. Live and share your gift to the world. Sharing our gift is making others to be happy in difficult times, whatever his situation is. The thing that is at our hands is quite enough to make it happen.
    So, yeah, I don’t know yet. I’m just a boy who is still studying for something in order to get an income and be part of this society. Everything else is in stand-by, but I’m making my best to change that and be a very happy boy. I’m happy to know that, but in whatever situation I may encounter later, to whomever people, I know I can be good at it.

:B