And I don't know if that matters.
I feel like a trembling in my emotional zone. Disruption of area by the Impact of a Message, a blow of the mind of someone who can easily throw those ideas effectively without hesitation and doubt. My counter response was nullified, was stopped by my own Resource of Equilibrium before the action was made.
Why could be that, the Internet, having a wide variety of sorts, can be limited on the actions in real life?
The actions made in real life are much huge than the Internet can recollect. Basically all the same thing. Kinda gloomy the last statement. That's why people give meanings and think about it.
A bunch of data saved on servers made by people, the fact that the people have made it has its own repercussions, both in space, and in time, in popularity, and importance by the ones who pointed to that data. Some people don't realize it, what that data could affect in others' minds. I can maintain my own position by the fact that this blog is still ongoing, since its start. But it's popularity isn't as great as others.
I could say nothing is more important than the fact I was making the things wrong since start. Insecurity after insecurity, after a desperation to write something, to express myself, to let out everything of myself, to give all to destroy all those bindings who were limiting myself, emotional and mentally. And also my ability to write things without saying to much. And receive appreciation, and kindness, and nice words, and pageviews, at least if someone could have seen it. It's a plus.
And, I still think that my world that is outside of the screen of the Digital World is still uncomfortable, because mainly all what I do here is not projecting to the Real World, I don't know if my family sees what I do, or what I have done.
I was thinking about having the first 100 drawings I've made so far, and print them, give them a webpage, kind of a showing case/portfolio, even if there're not as professional, or not even in the hobbyist notation, or maybe it might be. Then show it in a place where they can see what I draw, only because it's fun to me to draw. But even I am afraid of showing this to most of the people I know.
I tried, but I think I need to try harder.
But I hope to continue, at least fulfilling this year's resolutions, that aren't clearly made but I can show them.
